Some of our past customers were so happy with our work that
they gave us permission to use them as examples!

Original Version (edit by another top agency)
As indicated above, upon graduation, I prefer to work as a quantitative analyst for investment banks or securities institutions. And in the long run, rather than becoming an senior data analyst as experience accumulating, I would like to take the risk of starting my own business, severing individuals and corporations with optimized investment suggestions, helping them achieving profit maximized asset management. The journey of studying in Columbia University will definitely benefit and facilitate my path to reach my career goal.

GoGoEssay Version
In summary, through my academic and internship experience, I have discovered what I want to do with my life. I want to combine my passion for mathematics and love of problem solving and use them to address real world problems. I believe the best way for me to do this is to become a quantitative analyst. And in the long run, rather than becoming a senior data analyst, I hope to start my own company. Although being an entrepreneur is risky, my desire to make a difference gives me courage, and I strongly believe Columbia University would provide me the skills for what I hope is the beginning of an ambitious career.

Explanation

Personal statements are the key component of all successful applications. In today’s world, being smart and having a great CV and academic transcript are not enough. There are thousands of equally smart and motivated students. As a result, most universities focus on students' personal statements to get an idea of what kind of people their applicants really are.

The above applicant is confident, not afraid of challenges, and passionate about mathematics. Anyone who has a conversation with her would easily be able to discern this. However, her original personal statement did not convey her great personality. Fortunately, we were able to work with the applicant and make it clear that she is passionate about mathematics and has a “love of problem solving”. We show that even though she knows “being an entrepreneur is risky,” she has the confidence and desire to start a business anyways. Why does she have this courage and confidence? Because she has a “desire to make a difference."

While these changes may seem small, how an applicant tells his or her story is often the difference between an acceptance and rejection letter. Let us help you tell your story. Let us help you make your dream school a reality.